Yes, I saw the cockroach. Yes, it’s gross. No, I am not going to crawl around on the floor and attempt to kill it. Watching you all flip out over a bug is way more amusing and less personally disgusting. Maybe if everyone would stop leaving food out and start cleaning up after themselves it wouldn’t be in the room.
I’m sure everyone in this office cannot stand me, but the feeling is very much mutual.
Co-worker: “Scott, you’re up! You have to kill it.”
Me: “Nope.” Laughs and turns back around.